I wrote the content on this blog with sincere and holy intentions with the knowledge that I had at the time... We live, learn and errors are exposed and more truths are revealed...

Only GOD is perfect. It's vital that you seek the Lord to expose any errors that you've embraced. Please ask Him to expose any areas of darkness to you and for what is necessary to do to dispossess what's NOT of truth.



Flames of fire dance joyfully as dreams of fervor conjure up images of red hot passion for the gusto of life.

Sizzle, spark, explode -

Fireballs light up the sky. Wow! a thunder flash with a clap -

The flames are vivid with the awesome glow of orange colors blended with yellow highlights that accent the blaze.

This display is the bomb torched with a rocket plan. Such rapture has lit our fire. We are dynamite on this journey.

Come on fire, fall on us. Pour your liquid potency. Ignite our souls that we may be engulfed with magnified intensity.

Blow up our hearts. Dance with us....


Copyright 2010


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Saturday, February 5, 2011


Greetings -

Bear with me people as I get to how it came that he left me and moved in with the woman next door.  Here I will call him Paul.

I asked Paul if I could tell the part of this story that includes him.  He graciously granted me permission.

People have commented to me about my zeal for our Lord.  I have been called a warrior and general in the army of our Lord.  I heard Bishop Jakes say that people see his glory but they don't know or understand his story.  

Some readers have read on this blog some other posted accounts of my life story.  For those who  haven't and are so inclined, please go to the SEPARATE TAB on this blog titled, "MY LIFE + TO EVERY THING THERE IS A SEASON" and read topics such as  "TRIBUTE TO MY MOTHER," "GOD'S ADVENTURE FOR ME IN CHARLESTON , SOUTH CAROLINA - PART 1," and "GOD'S ADVENTURE FOR ME IN CHARLESTON - PART 2..."

Our Lord knows that I was not eager to do this post.  It will cause memories to surface.  Some of this is truth that some may find challenging to take in.  Our Father GOD told me to tell it because it is what it is.  Further, He reminded me that the Holy Bible contains accounts that are challenging to take in, nonetheless, it is truth. 

I'm not ashamed of any of what I share because I am fully persuaded that it is all covered by the blood of Christ.

Our Lord shared with me that someone is waiting to read this post - only GOD knows who and why.  He also informed me that, though, I'm not eager to revisit some "places," healing will happen for me on a larger scale for my obedience to do this.  By faith, I believe GOD!    


Here goes:

The bulk of my life has been spent in the inner city of Washington, D.C., my hometown.  For brief periods, I lived elsewhere - a few years off and on in Maryland, and about six months in Tampa, Florida.   

Typically, inner city areas are high in poverty, crime, violence and drug activity.  These days, though, such has spread quite a bit to suburban and urban areas.  In spite of all that exists here, it is my preference to live in the inner city.  When I worked in government, I had the option to move to suburban Maryland but remained where I prefer.

Before I proceed to the main theme of this post - a little background first.  Both of my parents are deceased and I am childless by choice.  I am the product of an extra-marital affair.  Both of my parents were married when they were "engaged."  It was no fling.  They were in love.  Anyway...years later, our Lord in His love, grace, and mercy saved them both, my mother first.

I am the youngest of four, and yes, I was spoiled.  My mother went to be with the Lord when I was a
teen-ager.  When she passed, I was a rebellious eighth grade drop-out.  I didn't drop out because I was unintelligent.  I did it because I chose foolishness over school.  I used heroin and pot.  Only GOD'S hand in my rebellious life prevented a drug habit from attaching itself to me.  A number of my peers succumbed to addiction.  Praise our Lord that He spared me that pain.

When my mother passed, I was consumed by guilt because of my less than honorable lifestyle.  The guilt rode me for years.  I loved her so and brought her such disappointment.  Of course, when I came to Christ, I came to understand GOD'S forgiveness and how to forgive myself.

Fast forward...

I got a job in the federal government when I was about seventeen years old.  In those days, a high school diploma wasn't required to get a government job.  They had a voluntary program that allowed those inclined to go to a program during work hours, at the expense of the government, to study for a GED.  I enrolled in the program and got my GED while employed in the federal government.

For seventeen years, I worked for the feds until the Lord told me to quit "my good government job."  It didn't make sense to me, and I waited, and waited and received from our Lord, confirmation upon confirmation that I was to quit.   My dearest Christian friend (I'll call her Linda) also worked for the same agency.  She offered me, rent and bill free, to live with her in her house.  We knew that it was a GOD thing.  I have since heard various testimonies from Christians of how the Lord told them to quit their jobs but back then I cannot recall that I had heard of such relative to Christians.

Various things occurred and then the Lord confirmed to Linda and I that I was to move to Baltimore, Maryland to live with my oldest sister.  I lived there a bit, got a job, and moved into my own apartment, and remained in Baltimore until three years later.  I was laid off from my job.  On said job, I got excellent performance reviews but when our Lord decides that it is time to move on, that is what He allows to happen.  He stated that he wanted me back in the D.C. area.

Once there, I lived for a bit with my other sister.  Suffice it to say that I and her husband were in conflict. 

By then, my close friend, Linda, had moved to D.C. from suburban Maryland.  She "rescued" me from my sister's house.  I was with Linda for a bit more, and then the Lord told me to move into a homeless shelter.  Did I have other family help options?  Yes, a few.  (My family, for the most part, is not close.)  But the Lord told me to go to the homeless shelter to live.  

It took about two weeks for the shock to my system to wear off.  After then, I was confident that the Lord had a purpose for this process.  I was able to gain work as a temp employee while housed at the shelter.  I am grateful to our Lord for the shelter experience and for the people that I met there.

Our Father GOD taught me so much about other people who found themselves in such circumstances.  Within, I became a "richer" person for the eight month period that I was there.  One of my roommates had a PhD - she was there because of a marriage gone badly.  Another roommate was a beautician.  There was a news producer, and at least one Jehovah's Witness there.  And of course, there were drug addicts and alcoholics in residence, as well.      

The shelter where I lived was formerly the Securities and Exchange Commission building.  It later housed a city college.  After a period of vacancy, it became a shelter that is located very near the Union (train) Station.  

Many people have the misconception that homeless people are, for the most part, drug and/or alcohol addicted, lazy, mentally challenged and unsanitary people.  I met a range of people.  One man had a steady job but sickness caused him to miss work for enough time that he fell behind,  some people have domestic violence issues, some get out of prison and have nowhere else to go.

These days, because of the present economy, more people are becoming homeless so a lot of the misconceptions have altered.  
Back then (more than ten years ago) I remember one day when I was in the Union Station area.  I cannot recall what led to the conversation but I informed someone that I was homeless.  I was never ashamed to express it.  The response was, "You don't look like a homeless person."  I replied, "What does a homeless person look like?"  The person looked perplexed and did not answer.

As stated earlier, my shelter experience was a rich one indeed.  Some of my most meaningful lessons came from alcoholics and drug addicts. 

While I lived at the shelter, numerous men expressed interest in me.  I was not at all interested.  In warm ways, I made it clear that I was a Christian and on a mission for GOD.

I had been there about five months when it happened - 

I met Paul.

He was a recovering drug addict, and get this - he was missing 2-3 front teeth with no job.  I had never in my life been attracted to a man with missing front teeth nor to a man that didn't have a job.  This gets sort of funny.  The other men in the shelter with all of their teeth, and some had jobs, couldn't figure out how I was attracted to Paul.  

The best way that I can explain it is that the other men came on as pressed to be with me.  Paul came on as very interested but not pressed.  I have never met a man who was so confident (not arrogant) who had so little - plus missing front teeth.  Now remember, I had worked in the federal government for seventeen years and engaged with a lot of men for work purposes and socializing.  Paul had more confidence than any other man that I had met.  They had more than Paul outwardly but they didn't have the level of confidence that he did.  You may wonder how could that be if Paul was a recovering drug addict...?  He was weak in areas (aren't we all?) but that inner strength in Paul was evident. Our Lord knows us from the foundation of the world.  I have since learned that Paul belongs to GOD and GOD knows that we belong to Him before we know it.  More on that on another post (relative to Paul.)               

Did you guess?  I backslid.

Bear with me saints while I share this bit of sin slide. On a given day, Paul and I left the shelter to ride the subway to a motel.  That  was our first motel "journey."  What particularly struck me was that as we rode the subway, I noticed that Paul had brought along a book to read.  I was quite surprised.  Who brings a book to read for the first motel weekend with a "love" interest?  After "recovering" from my surprise, I felt a level of respect for that choice that he had made to bring a book.  It is not easy to explain.  Maybe someone can help me on that.  "All these years later, when I think about that "episode," I laugh.  I am 54 years old and have never dated any other man that came with a book to read for a date or motel stay.  

To be continued


Written Saturday February 5, 2011

Copyright 2011

UPDATE: I completed this story on Wednesday February 9, 2011, and am pleased to report that it was not a painful experience to re-visit, as I had anticipated.  Praise our Lord that it was, with ease, that I wrote all four parts of this story from my life. 



  2. Interesting....I pray for ears and eyes to be opened in the name of Jesus Christ's powerful name. Amen and amen!


  3. Hi Child of God -

    Thank you for visiting and commenting.

    Praise our Lord that He knows us from the foundation of the world...

  4. Thank you for letting me read this post.

    I am trying so hard to be obedient to God, but I still am not perfect as long as I inhabit this shell of this body that I'm in, which is okay with me though, because I know Heaven with my Lord Jesus Christ is waiting.

    God's Blessings to you my sister in Christ,


  5. Sandra,
    You've salted me, I'm eager to hear "the rest of the story"....

    I always appreciate your honesty and your openness.

    I've been homeless and jobless more than once in the last 13 years
    since my divorce. But never stayed in a shelter. Kind christian friends
    took me in until the Lord gave me the means to live on my own again.

    After a year of homelessness and joblessness, He gave me two jobs within
    the same week. One of them was at a shelter for women. I loved my work there.
    I loved the women I met and the stories they shared. I will never forget them.
    What a rich experience indeed.

    I'm not afraid of homeless shelters. If the Lord were to send me there to live, I too would go!

    Blessings, Sandra
    Patrina <")>><

  6. Hi Patrina -

    It is such a pleasure to hear from you. Thank you for visiting and commenting.

    It warms my heart to know that the Lord had you to comment on this and to discover that you, too had experienced homelessness. I love that you stated, "What a rich experience indeed."

    Thank you, Patrina, for sharing.

  7. Sandra - Oh, goodness. You can't stop yet...

    There have been many things you've written that are profound, and many things that have inspired and encouraged me. But, my dear friend, what courage you have shown in this post. A brave and open heart, bearing her story for HIS glory. How I applaud you for that. God is smiling on you, Sandra - He will bring great reward for reaching out in your truth, and HIS truth, to others.

    I also know the tremendous love a "prodigal" has for the Lord who rescues her - I was one! I will anxiously await the next installment of this story - and I am already celebrating the Spirit who never lets go of us!!


    (I also was drawn into a "wrong" relationship with a man - and what attracted me to him was that he read books. I did too, and the rest was history...)

  8. Hi Sharon -

    Thank you, precious lady, for your deeply meaningful comments. It surely encourages me to know that this piece has helped others. Patrina, whose comment is just above yours here, warmed my heart also with her "story."

    Praise our Lord for what He is doing...!

    Note: The plan is to post Part 2 within about three days unless our Lord directs otherwise.

  9. My Goodness, Lion Eagle!
    I thought I would just stop by to visit and all of a sudden was right there with you in your story!
    Thank you so much for your honesty and transparency! I served in a Homeless Shelter in LA and learned sooooo much- a variety of women there for a variety of reasons, not always substance related.
    I thank you for your two comments and look forward to hearing the rest of your & blessings to you, Strong Woman of GOD!

    By the way- Sharon and I are having a weekend away so we can write and encourage each other and she shared your blog and Beverly's blog and I have been blessed tonight by both of your blogs! Keep writing!


  10. Intriguing testimony Sandra and you left us with the cliff hanger. As I finished reading, I'm reminded of the lyrics of a song that says I don't look like what I've been through.

  11. Thank you, Sandra. Two things---

    1. Lots of ous have college degrees, but you have a superior education

    2. Your openness in your testimony will help others immensely. God bless you.

  12. Blessings Sandra...what a place to continue your story... so I will wait!!!

    Thank you for being obedient and sharing as God leads, it will be used to minister to someone or more and all the glory will go to God!

    Very honest and good insights! You've taken care of this "people see his glory but they don't know or understand his story" and given great testimony for homeless, shelters, education, socializing, (should I go on?) Praise God! May this be used and help immensely every nugget to bring Light with God's truth as you share!

    (I'll try to read the CIRCUS one soon)!

  13. Greetings -

    Thank you for visiting and commenting.

    I don't know why the Lord has led me to bare so much but He did tell me that "someone" was waiting for it. Truly, it is all about GOD and what He desires to accomplish.

    I must say that I am pleasantly surprised about the comments here from others who have had personal experiences with the homeless issue. I didn't expect that.

    Good to hear about your weekend getaway with Sharon. It is fun to have such "seasons."

    I like those song lyrics. What song is that?

    You are certainly welcome, Clint.

    You expressed, "Your openness in your testimony will help others immensely."

    I believe you ,Clint because the Lord pressed upon me to bare the truths because "someone" was waiting for it.

    God bless you, too, Clint.

    Yes, I believe that one reason that our Lord had me to share so openly is because some people know about the glory but not the stories that had to unfold to reach glory status. Further, I believe that our Lord told me to post these very revealing truths because it needs to be known by more people that there is a price to pay for serving GOD in fullness. He is so worth it all but by no means is it a "cake walk." Again, GOD IS SO WORTH IT! The joy He provides is above all suffering...

    Yes, Peggy - Praise GOD!

  14. Lioneagle...thanks so much for stopping by my blog! And now I have added you to my blog list. I will definitely be reading the rest of this story!!! God has called us to be real in our struggles so that we might be a blessing to others. Thanks for being real!

    By the way, technically me and my family are homeless...we live with my mother, and have been for going on two years. I have finally accepted it as a God thing...He wants us here for a reason! It can happen to anyone, anytime. There but for the grace of God...I'm grateful to my mother for housing us in this season of our lives. It is of benefit to her too, so God works it all out for good.

    I look forward to reading more!

  15. Hi Mining for Diamonds -

    Thank you for visiting and commenting.

    You are certainly welcome. It was a pleasure to read from content on your blog. Certainly I will visit there more.

    It encourages me that you said, "God has called us to be real in our struggles so that we might be a blessing to others. Thanks for being real!"

    Thank you for the encouragement and further faith and hope in our Lord's missions.

    Glory to God, Mining for Diamonds, for where and how He has placed you. Our Lord always knows precisely what He is doing and why. May He enrich you all in your current living arrangment. He reigns...!


Greetings -

Thank you for visiting and commenting. It is my pleasure to read from your heart places. We are all students and teachers and I so enjoy, precious people, the beneficial engagements with you.